A Plotless Story
by Angel-chan Desu
Summary: Basically a crack fic where it is one half story and one half Ask-Us-Questions. Suggestions for story are greatly appreciated. Ask any question you like. While write ANY pairing if suggested. :3 Warning: Swearing and complete randomness. Hide yo sanitee!
1. Chapter 1

Angel-chan: Heyy, people o' Fan Fiction~! Tis **Angel-chan Desu** here (You may all call me Angel-chan or Destany-chan, however I will refer to myself as Angel-chan, just so you know), and Imma try something a little different.

Teto: Like?

Angel-chan: Well, this story is a mixture of a crack story and a question thingy. Basically, one half is the story, the other is the part where the reviewers ask you guys questions.

Miku: Could people start by asking me who I like? I'm confused; do I like Kaito, do I like Len, do I like Mikuo, Luka, Gumi?_!_ MAH! I'm so confused~!

Angel-chan: C-calm down, Miku-chan. We'll sort this all out. However, because this is the first chapter, it shall both be; short, and only the story part, because, he-llo-o, no questions to ask! BTW, there is nearly no plot to this story. :3

Kaito: Good to know.

Angel-chan: Now then, let us begin!

* * *

><p><strong>Let's start our story...in a jungle. Shit always happens in a jungle.<strong>

Meiko: Like?

Angel-chan: I dunno. People getting mauled by bears and meese?

Rin: Meese isn't a word.

Angel-chan: It isn't?

Len: [nods] And you can't get mauled by a moose.

Angel-chan: ...Eh, whatever. Anyway-

**[cue screaming]**

Angel-chan: ...Who's screaming?

**Suddenly, Kaito runs out of a nearby bush, screaming and waving his arms around his head, which appears to have bees buzzing around it.**

Miku: Kaito? But weren't you just with us?

**Kaito ignores the question. He is still running around, screaming and waving his arms.**

Neru (Let's just assume that the main, popular Vocas (And Teto, for those paranoid, specific nutjobs) are all here): And what'd you do to piss off the bees?

**Kaito ignores Neru. He is still running arou- wait. He just tripped up and fell into a tree. The bees have now scattered.**

Meiko: [gasp] Kaito!

**She runs to her lover (The authoress is a KaiMei fan, deal with it bitches) and picks him up, swatting away the bees he smoshed onto himself (Which are, miraculously, still alive. You'd think they would've died after that fat, ice cream lovin' bastard squished them).**

Kaito: [groggily] Am I alive? I see an angel.

Meiko: [blushing] Aww, he thinks I'm an angel.

Angel-chan: [surprised/confused] Really? I thought you were Satan incarnate.

Meiko: [glares]

Kaito: [sits up suddenly] My angel! [he holds his hands out in front of him, towards Angel-chan]

Angel-chan (Surprised/disgusted)/Meiko (Pissed/disgusted): Eh?_!_

**And...let's leave it off there. Please, send in your suggestions as to what should happen next!**

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><p>Angel-chan: Oh yeah, nearly forgot to mention; the actual story part of this fic is also reviewer controlled. Sometimes, the above will happen, asking you for suggestions about what should happen, and sometimes, it will give you options. The most votes for one option will get written.<p>

Now, suggest away! XD


	2. Chapter 2

Angel-chan: And we're back, and might I just say, what the fuck Kaito?_!_

**Kaito lies injured in Meiko's arms. Despite originally being angry with him, she is now nursing him back to health, saying 'I can't hate my chubby bear forever.'**

Neru: I'm pretty damn sure that was a hit on his weight and his ice cream addiction.

Angel-chan: Also, might I just say, thank you Gakupo for, ahem, 'Taking care of him', for me.

Gakupo: [sheathing his sword] No problem. Just remember... [holds out his hand and flicks his fingers in a 'Gimmie' fashion]

Angel-chan: Aye, aye, hold yer breath, lad (Scottish fail!_!_) [looks around inside pocket and pulls out a tiny eggplant that looks like Luka]

Gakupo: [squee's then runs to the hills]

Angel-chan: ...Oookay then...well, we already have a few questions so, we will begin with the Q&A portion of the story.

**From _Phoenixlight13_:**

**Kaito: Did you really want to kill the Vocaloids in Kaito ga UNINSTALL?**

**Miku: What is your least favorite color?**

Teto: Since Kaito is currently incapacitated right now, we will leave that question till the end, if that's okay. Plus, the authoress needs to go look up the song, preferably subbed.

**Everyone looks at the UTAUloid like she'd sprouted a set of horns and a moustache, as well as another head.**

Teto: [confused] What? I can be smart! Especially since Angel-chan likes to see me as the genki crazy fun girl. So, as per **Mousey14's** request, I, the unexpected one, am going to be the sane person.

Miku: ...Right. Okay then. Now then, my least favourite colour...hmm...that is a tricky one...

Rin: Oy, we're going to be here forever!

Len: Wanna go ride the roadroller till the actual story starts?

Rin: [pause...shurgs] Sure, why not?

**As the Kagamines leave, Miku knows her answer.**

Miku: Oh! I know! Burned negi!

Everyone: …

Miku: Because first off, negi is better off raw. You get all the flavours in there, and you don't lose them. And second, [suddenly angry] if you're going to cook negi, cook it right. You lose vital flavours cooking it anyway, but if you burn it, you are just fucking messing with the food of the gods, bitches! If I find any of you burning negis, Imma coming for ya, motherfu-!

**Miku is suddenly grabbed by Neru and Haku, and is bound and gagged. She's still pretty pissed, so let's leave the Q&A here and move on...**

* * *

><p><strong>Our heroes are now no longer in the jungle. The authoress, despite being off watching <em>Kaito ga Uninstall<em> and therefore, isn't present at the current moment, decided to move them to a sky civilisation. If you are wondering how, why and when...then why you asking me? I'm only the narrator! Ask in a review! [hint hint]**

Luka: Hey, since when could we fly?

Gumi: We'd kind of have to if we were in a sky civilisation.

Neru: I hate logic! Logic can go fuck its mother! [begins trolling and blogging and trolling blogs and blogging trolls]

Haku: Logic gives me a headache. And I've already got a huge hangover. [begins drinking]

Teto: Drinking isn't going to help your hangover or your headache. And trolling and blogging and trolling blogs and blogging trolls won't make logic go away.

Luka: Oh my god, will you stop it with the sanity! This story is supposed to take _away_ sanity!

**Then, Luka lunged at Teto, looking extremely pissed off. Teto screams. Everyone flies to help protect her and stop Luka...**

**Now then, dear readers. Teto's life is in you hands. Should Luka kill her? Or should Luka be stopped, bound and gagged, like Miku? Who, by the way, is still ranting and raving about burned negis.**

* * *

><p>Miku: MMMPGH!<p>

Angel-chan: I'm ba-ack! And, Kaito is healthy enough to answer the question. Plus, I've seen the video. So sad. Tragic. Yet, oddly enough...so sweet, at the same time.

Kaito: Well, to answer Phoenix, yes. But, all I ever did was for my master.

Angel-chan: ...Oddly enough, you remind me a lot of Souseiseki from Rozen Maiden...


	3. Chapter 3

Angel-chan: Yoo haa! XD

Len: ...What?

Angel-chan: Nothin'. Its just a little somethin' somethin' I do. Its basically my way of sayin' hi. :3

Rin: By the way, why weren't we in the story part of last chapter?

Angel-chan: ...Blonde much? You and Len left while Miku was deciding what her least favourite colour was. You were both driving around in your awesome sauce roadroller while Luka was attacking Teto in a sky civilisation.

Rin and Len: Eh?_!_ Luka was doing what to Teto?_!_

Angel-chan: You heard me. Now then, we have quite a few questions this chapter. However, first, we have to save Teto, bind and gag Luka and put her on happy pills, as recommended by **Durp** (Anonymous). :)

* * *

><p><strong>Back with the sky civilisation...<strong>

Gumi: Phew, thank god Angel-chan gave me this pile of rope at the beginning of the chapter.

Neru: And me this chair.

Haku: She gave me these happy pills a while ago, but I haven't gotten to taking them yet. Luka needs them more then me right now though.

**Luka is now tied up and having happy pills shoved down her throat. Once the whole bottle was gone, she was then gagged.**

Teto: Sh-she was going to kill me! O_O

Angel-chan: Naw! She was gonna give you a bear hug! [/sarcasm]

Teto: 4_4

Gumi: ...huh?

Angel-chan: Ignore that, that's just me trying out emoticons on you guys. Now then, let's ask the sky people for some food and water and shelter, because I feel like keeping us here for a few more chapters.

**We then see- oh fuck, they have weapons! Why the fuck do they have weapons?_!_**

Angel-chan: Hey, I never left them any sharp things in my computer!

Everyone: ...What?

Angel-chan: Well, I use the sky people to power my computer. They work 24 hours a day, even if the computer isn't on, and I feed them cookie scraps. Computer cookies, not real ones. I can't afford to get myself and them real cookies.

Len: ...That would explain why they look so pissed off with you. But uh...why do they look pissed off at us too?

Angel-chan: Because I told them that they work for you as well. So any suffering that happens to them, they'll blame both me, and you guys!

Rin: Why the fuck would you tell them that?_!_

Angel-chan: Because I didn't want to get tortured alone. But Teto will be safe. I told them that she was part of a charity that was trying to prevent the cruelty and abuse of sky civilians. ^_^

Teto: Yay!

Angel-chan: Now run, Teto! Run to where Miku is! Take Len, Kaito and Meiko with you then toss 'em back once they've answered their questions!

Len, Kaito and Meiko: O_O

Angel-chan: SeeU is waiting for you at home base! [salutes the great and almighty Teto] Good luck, soldier.

Teto: [salutes back] And to you.

**Teto then runs off, with Len, Kaito and Meiko in tow, leaving Angel-chan with all the other pissed off vocaloids and sky civilians. Good thing I'm safe in the narrator's box, heh heh.**

Angel-chan: They want to kill you too. Didn't you know that?

**Oh fu- [static]**

* * *

><p><em><strong>Back-up narrator: Hello there. I am the back-up narrator. I am also the co-narrator whenever Angel-chan is bothered with including me.<strong>_

_**Now then, let us see what is happening at home base...**_

SeeU: [walks in] Okay, Angel-chan said that Teto would be here by the time the Q&A started. And yet...

[audience cheers and applauds her arrival]

SeeU: [surprised] Oh, well...thank you. That's very kind of you all.

_**And then, before SeeU can blush and act all modest and cute, Teto runs in, dragging Len, Kaito and Meiko. Their bums are now red raw, and Kaito's has nearly caught on fire simply because abusing Kaito is fun and not illegal.**_

Meiko: First, you're too nice. Just say that we were dragged in on our asses. And second, why am I always last?_!_ I know that the writer always writes Kaito's name first, then deletes that and writes it like its been seen always, but now its just getting fuc-

Teto: [slapping a strip of tape over Meiko's mouth] Please, no profanity!

Len: ...We swear all the time on here! Why do you, or anyone else, care if anyone swears or not?_!_

Teto: ...[shrugs] I dunno.

SeeU: Ahem.

_**Everyone turns to the Korean.**_

SeeU: Could we please? We have quite a few questions to get through and Angel-chan doesn't want to entire Q&A section to be banter and silliness.

Meiko: [muffled] Mor monph (Translation: For once).

SeeU: Right. Now, the first question is from **Mousey14**:

**Ask Meiko and Miku about their opinions on the KaitoXMiku and KaitoXMeiko fanwar. **…** And ask Len what he thinks of the 'older fanboys' that watch his videos. **

Teto: I'll go get Miku.

Meiko: Moph oboph me? (What about me?)

SeeU: You can just speak through the tape. Translation is provided. The same will be applied to Miku.

Teto: [dragging a still struggling and tied up Miku] Geez, this chick needs to lay off the negi.

Miku: [glares]

Len: [pales] O-Older fanboys? I didn't know I had such a thing.

Kaito: Erm...well, I like...both girls equally.

Teto: [snickering] Admit it Kaito, you'd be willing to screw either one so long as they brought you ice cream.

Kaito: [blushing] Th-that's not-

Teto: Is too true! Hah!

SeeU: What happened to being the sensible one?

Teto: I switch between my sensible side and my crazy genki side. Plus, Luka tried to kill me because I was being too sensible, so I won't act sensible for a few chapters till she realises that my sensible side was requested! [folds her arms and pouts]

SeeU: ...Oookay. We'll continue the first of your questions next time Mousey-

Teto: Because Angel-chan is lazy.

SeeU: ...Fine. And so, we'll move onto the next question. This one is from **Mr Kat is hot**:

**Miku: will you marry kaito soon? Can you kis him, for the sake of mikuXkaito fans? please?**

Miku: Mirpht moff, no, me ngd Maipho are moph gephing marriphd. Ngd mphecngd...fin. So mong as miph tape iph taphn moff me! (First off, no, me and Kaito are not getting married. And second...fine. So long as this tape is taken off me!)

SeeU: [sigh] Very well then. [takes tape off of Miku's mouth]

Miku: Ah, much better.

_**And so, with the help of SeeU, Teto and a still pale and quiet Len, Miku's chair is scooted over to Kaito.**_

Miku: [plants one on Kaito's cheek] There. Now can I please be untied?

Teto: Wait till next chapter.

SeeU: And before all the Miku x Kaito fans get annoyed and begin flaming, let me just clarify that there was no specific area for the kiss. In future, with the authoress being a Meiko x Kaito fan, please specify if you want to kiss to be of the lip locking variety. Thank you. [bows while Teto tosses the others back into the story and drags Miku backstage]

_**Yes, this has been SeeU, your Q&A host, and the back-up narrator. Thank you for reading.**_

Meiko: Mour moo moliph. (You're too polite.)

* * *

><p><strong>Yes, myself, Angel-chan and the vocaloids are still in trouble. We are, in fact, tied to a very long stick and being carried towards a FUCKING VOLCANO!<strong>

Angel-chan: Please don't shout in caps. Its annoying to type.

**Everyone else, including myself, glares at that fucking authoress who, despite being tied up, is smiling and humming _I=Fantasy_.**

Angel-chan: Oh, and, before I forget; please remember to send in your suggestions and questions for the next chapter. It is up to you guys to determine whether we live or get barbecued. Please say you don't want us to die; this is a very fun story and if we all got barbecued next chapter, the story would've ended.

Also, might I just say that there is no fucking way I am getting SeeU involved in this crazy shit. So she is the host of the Q&A section, meaning that she gets to stay at home base.

Teto, however, will get involved. Simply because a) she's awesome and b) she's a chimera. Those two facts alone would save her from any crazy incident she happens to get involved in. Like this one for instance, if she were here. But she isn't. She's safe at home base with SeeU.

...Okay, that's it. :)


End file.
